Questions to Ask on a Virtual Fertility Consultation

You have forty minutes with a physician who has never met you. Here is how to spend them.

Most people come out of a first fertility consultation realizing they forgot to ask the things that mattered. The call fills up with the clinic's presentation, you nod through the parts you do not fully follow, and the practical questions surface at 2am three days later.

Bring a written list. Ask permission to record. Below is a set organized by what you are actually trying to learn, with notes on what a good answer sounds like.

Outcomes — the numbers behind the marketing

• For patients my age using their own eggs, what percentage of embryo transfers resulted in a live birth last year — and how many transfers is that based on?
• How do you count cancelled cycles in the rates you publish?
• Are donor-egg cycles included in your overall success figures, or reported separately?
• How many retrieval cycles does this clinic perform annually?
• What percentage of your cycles get cancelled before retrieval?

Good answer: specific figures with denominators, offered without hesitation, including the unflattering ones. Concerning answer: a single high percentage with no age breakdown, or redirection to testimonials.

The lab — where IVF is actually won

• Who is your laboratory director and what are their credentials?
• How many embryologists are on staff, and how many cycles does each handle?
• What is your blastocyst thaw survival rate?
• What quality certifications does the lab hold, and who audits them?
• Do you have backup power, alarmed incubators, and off-site monitoring for the cryotank?

That last one sounds paranoid until you know that the most publicized failures in IVF history have been tank monitoring failures, not clinical errors. A lab that has thought about it will answer immediately and in detail.

Your protocol specifically

• Based on my records, what protocol are you proposing, and why that one?
• What response are you expecting from me, and at what point would you cancel?
• Would you recommend ICSI in my case, and on what basis?
• Do you recommend PGT for me? Why or why not?
• What would you change if this cycle does not work?

The reasoning matters more than the plan. You are testing whether this physician is treating you or running a package. A doctor who explains why your prior cycle responded the way it did, and what they would do differently, is engaging with your case.

Money, in writing

• Can you send an itemized written quote covering everything through first-year storage?
• What is specifically not included that I should expect to pay for?
• What is the payment schedule, and what is refundable at each stage?
• If the cycle is cancelled for poor response, what happens to money already paid?
• What do medications cost if I buy them there, and can you give a range?
• What are annual storage fees after year one, and how are they billed?

Logistics you need to plan around

• How many days do I need to be there, and for which stage?
• Do you work with patients doing monitoring at home? How do results get transmitted?
• Who is my point of contact, and what are their hours in my time zone?
• Does my partner need to be present, or can we freeze a sample in advance?
• Are consent forms and medication instructions available in English?
• What happens if I have a complication after I fly home?

The three questions people are embarrassed to ask

"What are my actual odds?"

Ask it plainly. A physician who will not give you a realistic estimate — including a discouraging one — is not going to give you honest information later either. You want the doctor who says "in your situation I would expect a lower yield and I want you to know that going in."

"When would you tell me to stop, or to consider donor eggs?"

This tests whether the clinic has a point at which it stops selling. The answer should exist.

"Why should I choose you over the clinic I spoke with last week?"

Slightly awkward and highly informative. Good clinics answer with specifics about their lab, their volume, or their approach to your particular case. Weaker ones disparage the competitor or pivot to price.

After the call

Write down your impressions within an hour, while they are still sharp: Did they read your records? Did they explain or assert? Did they answer the money questions directly? Did anything feel rushed or evasive?

Do this for at least two clinics before deciding. The comparison is far more informative than any single conversation, and the differences between clinics tend to be obvious the moment you put two sets of notes side by side.

Common Questions